How a Simple Song Teaches Big Lessons

Have you ever wondered what goes on in the mind of a two-year-old during a simple game? These moments, though seemingly ordinary, are filled with rich opportunities for growth and learning. Today, I want to share a story that illustrates the power of such moments and how they tie into the broader mission of Conscious Pathways.

Our perspective on children deeply influences how we interact with and support them. When we view each child as deserving of compassion and support, it shapes our actions and responses, fostering an environment where they can thrive. This understanding is crucial because children learn and develop best in spaces where they feel respected and valued.

A few weeks ago, I was working with a small group of children, all around the age of 2—my favorite age to work with, frankly. We were playing a toddler room classic, "Hop Little Bunnies." This song is great for working with this age group for multiple reasons:

• The song has clear and simple directives through the musical cues and words. Children know exactly how to interact at each point in the song.

• Because the song has both fast and slow sections, it’s a great resource for practicing regulation skills (we’ll get into more of this later).

• It’s repetitive. While that’s not always great for our adult sanity, it’s perfect for the way young children learn.

Music and movement activities like this are fantastic ways for young children to practice many skills all at once. They practice social skills by learning to occupy a close space together and navigate conflict that naturally arises. They experiment with ways to move their bodies. Their cognitive skills get a workout as they listen to cues in the songs.

As the students jumped to the music, having a great time, I noticed one of the children becoming dysregulated. What’s dysregulation? Imagine a cup filling up with water. Throughout the day, the water level fluctuates up and down. We all start our day with different water levels in our cups. The water can represent anything from sensory input to emotional stress. When the cup overflows, it’s called dysregulation—essentially, the nervous system becomes overwhelmed.

For this particular child, the sensory input from the music, combined with the excitement of the other children, seemed to be the trigger. I could tell by the way he was moving his body carelessly, the over-the-top laughing, and the dazed look in his eyes that he was close to overflowing. I had two options: stop the music and calm the group or continue observing and help this child re-regulate with my support. Since I had enough adults around to support the rest of the children, I chose the second option.

Why? Both choices are valid, depending on the context. Many classroom teachers don't have the time, space, or knowledge to give each student one-on-one attention, a systemic issue rather than a fault of individual teachers. As adults, we sometimes have a well-meaning urge to swoop in and save children from themselves. However, as long as the children are safe, it's crucial they make mistakes and fully express their emotions. This is how they learn. This won't be the last time a child feels dysregulated over the course of their life.

When the child pushed another and pulled their hair, I stepped in. First, I focused on regulation strategies (curious about how I did this? I’ll have a full blog on the website this week!) and then we checked on the other child together.

My background in child development allows me to understand that this behavior is natural and normal for children this age. Young children rely on adults to regulate with them, a process called co-regulation. However, this moment stands out for another reason. Throughout this entire process, I never once thought this child was bad or violent. Throughout my career in early childhood education, I’ve worked with many dysregulated children. They may hit, bite, spit, yell, or throw objects. I understand these actions often stem from unmet needs, an overwhelmed nervous system, or an undiagnosed issue. While this doesn’t excuse the behavior, it provides insight into why it’s happening.

I see all children as deserving of unconditional love, respect, and compassion. I also see all children as capable, resilient, and smart. This perspective allows me to respond to their needs in holistic ways that honor their humanity. Many children, especially Black and brown children, are punished and stigmatized for behavior that is normal for their age. Practices like suspension and expulsion in Pre-K through 12th grade ultimately harm students and the community. I started Conscious Pathways to address this issue, to uplift educators and community members with resources to better support their students, to empower students to advocate for themselves, and to change educational policy to protect students and teachers from systemic harm.

I’m on a mission to transform education and re-imagine a better future. Who’s with me?

Love and light,

Brittney Carey